Counting on You
by fetching
Summary: She had been reckless before, but this? This was going too far. But, he would never abandon her - ever. Especially not when she was so clearly broken.


**Welcome! This is my very first Vampire Knight fanfiction. I hope you all enjoy it. It's all little different from my other stories; a little more mysterious, vague. It might turn out alright, it might not. It is a songfic, due to the fact that they are my specialty****. The song used is called 'Save You' by Simple Plan. Dedicated to Michelle for getting me hooked on this series and for being the only one other than me to get excited when this song comes on.**

**I own nothing.**

_Take a breath_

_I pull myself together_

_Just another step_

_Until I reach the door_

_You'll never know the way_

_It tears me up inside to see you_

_I wish that I could tell you something_

_To take it all away_

Another dance. Another chance. He watches her. He's always watching her. She waits for someone. He knows exactly who she is waiting for, and it hurts. It hurts because she is hurt. It hurts because he's always been there; not **him**. He has always been rejected by her. She shakes her head and turns away; she always has, just as he expects she always will. Yet, he never stops trying. He always has that small glimmer of hope that maybe, one day, she will accept his offer.

He stands in front of her, hand outstretched. He expects the usually reaction; a shake of the head as she turns away. He bows his head, waiting for her rejection. He hears a sigh and feels the warmth of another hand in his. He looks up, shocked. She gives a slight nod of her head. He leads her to the dance floor as the soft music begins.

_Sometimes I wish I could save you_

_And there's so many things that I want you to know_

_I won't give up 'till it's over_

_If it takes you forever_

_I want you to know_

He twirls her around. He wishes she knew. He is amazed by her grace, and wonders why she doesn't see it too. He considers her the most beautiful woman on Earth. She wonders why the one she wants doesn't notice. He knows she is strong. She feels weak. He has always protected her. He always makes sure that she is safe. He had been trying so hard to show her how he cared, but she was so distracted by the unreachable. Did women always want what they couldn't have? Perhaps. Then again, you could always find at least one perfect match in the world. Maybe he wasn't meant to be with his perfect match. Maybe he was only meant to watch from afar, hoping that one day, the woman he loves might turn around and realize how long he had been waiting for her. He ponders this thought and realizes that even if that did happen, he would probably still come in second place. Doomed to watch his true love with another. Yes, that sounded about right.

_When I hear your voice_

_It's drowning in the whispers_

_You're just skin and bones_

_There's nothing left to take_

_And no matter what I do_

_I can't make you feel better_

_If only I could find the answer_

_To help me understand_

He places a hand on her waist as he dips her close to the ground and pulls her up into a twirl. He realizes the problem immediately and pain clenches talons around his heart. She is so fragile. So thin. He hates her. No, that wasn't it. He didn't truly hate her. He hated what she did to herself. He also hated **him** for being the cause. She couldn't understand why **his** attentions were never focused on her. After days of silence, she had come to the most ridiculous conclusion. She believed that her looks were insufficient in capturing **his** attention. She had taken down every mirror in her room. She wore more makeup and ate less. It was devastating to watch such a beautiful woman destroy herself so completely. He had asked her about her problems. He had asked her why she did not eat. She replied with 'I'm not feeling well.' Apparently she 'didn't feel well' for the past couple of months. He had never questioned her again. Not when her hair lost it's shine and her makeup became more prominent. Not even when her clothing became baggy and loose. Sunken eyes show another side to her story. One that tells him she is lying and losing control. Sunken eyes show how dead she really is and only highlight the fact that fate is a cruel being. Her elbows are sharp; face pointed; eyes sunken; hips bony and delicate. He fears that one wrong move may break her; and that is exactly what he hates.

_If you fall, stumble down_

_I'll pick you up off the ground_

_If you lose faith in you_

_I'll give you strength to pull through_

His mind is flooded with images of her; memories of her that had haunted him for weeks.

***Flashback***

**A quick slash. That was all. Somehow, that quick slash was quickly diagnosed as more than a slight problem. That quick slash had been enough to leave a deep wound in her abdomen. And the blood, oh, the blood! He had rarely ever seen so much from one attack. She toppled over as in slow motion, shock still evident in her features. He immediately rushed to her, completely forgetting his surroundings. The enemy would get away - he didn't care. He couldn't care less about anything actually. There would be another chance to fight this battle. Now was the time for him to care for her; just as he always had. He cradle's her gently as he stands, watching carefully around. Her blood stains his shirt. She had the sweetest blood to ever tempt him, yet this is his last thought. He cared for nothing except saving her. He wished the bleeding would stop. She was so pale. As he trudged back, he knew that he would never let her hurt this way again.**

***End Flashback***

It had only gotten worse. As he twirls her around, he distinctly remembers the after-attack they had experienced half way to safety. They had been ambushed on the way back. With her being hurt, he had been the only one able to protect them both. She had been even more torn up. Even more blood was spilled and bruises blossomed all along the left of her face as they ran down her neck and stained her arms and back. When they had finally gotten to safety, she had been so close to giving up.

***Flashback***

"**I can't do this." She whimpered****. He refused to believe her statement. She had felt like she was being ripped to pieces from the inside out. He wasn't going to let her give up, not after everything she'd been through. He knew she was stronger than that. She didn't feel like she was. He wasn't going to give her a choice. She **_**had**_** to be stronger.**

"**Yes you can."**

"**I'm too weak to make it. I…I can't. I'm going to fade." She whispered. A silent tear rolled down her bruised face. He lifted a finger and, in the most gentle way possible, brushed it away.**

"**Not if I'm around."**

***End Flashback***

He thinks she gives up to easily. She regrets giving in to the pain. Yet, he is always waiting. Maybe she regrets giving in to the pain more than she should. Maybe he is the one amplifying this regret because he himself has never given in to pain. Given, he thinks, he doesn't experience the same pain. He feels the knife plunge his heart every time he sees her waiting. Every time her face falls, every time her heart plummets. He is always the one to save her. Even when in doing so, he is killing himself on the inside.

_Tell me you won't give up_

'_Cause I'll be waiting if you fall_

_You know, I'll be there for you_

***Flashback***

**He hears the sickening CRACK of flesh on flesh. He waits around the corner of her room, knowing enough to not be caught. As soon as she is once again alone in the room he hears her drop to her knees as she emits muffled sobs. He pushes the door open slowly. She is huddled in the corner, face unseen through her hair. He glides over and drops cross-legged next to her on the floor. She continues sobbing. He reaches a hand out to her, testing his boundaries. She wraps her arms around herself, as if holding herself together. She doesn't pull away and he breathes a sigh of relief. He carefully tucks her hair behind her ear, revealing a painfully obvious red area of skin.**

"**What happened?" He whispered. Nothing was worse than this. Nothing was more damn **_**degrading **_**than this.**

"**I tried to hurt her." She choked. "I don't know what happened. I just…I just…I" She can't speak through the tears. He is confused as to what her reasoning could be, but questions no further. He grasps her hand and examines the faint red line across the back.**

"**Artemis."**

**She nods her head miserably and begins to shake. He carefully pulls her onto his lap and wraps his arms around her. He will never understand her actions. He will never need to. No matter what she has done or no matter what someone has done to her, he will always be there to catch her. No matter what the rest of the world might see, he believes that inside she is able to feel. She is able to feel everything…and it hurts.**

***End Flashback***

The song ends. A single tear slides down her face. He raises a hand to gently brush it away. As she walks away, he knows that she will get better. He won't give up on her until she does.

Ruka just wants **his **acceptance.

Kain only fights for hers.

**Well I hope you all enjoyed this! If you have any questions about anything feel free to PM me. Sadly this will be my last update for the next month or so because I am going on vacation and do not have access to a computer. (At least not that I'm yet aware of.) So I wish you all the best of summers! Reviews would be a lovely goodbye present. Hint hint. Any constructive criticism would also be very helpful. **

**-Silverlilly92**


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